Corny Clan Updates: My Grandma was a Lincoln Town Car

Today was Grandma Nelda's funeral. It was a beautiful day here in Arizona - clear, crisp and sunny. Brent's entire family gathered to remember their colorful matriarch. In the morning, we had a short internment service at the mortuary with six of her ten great-grandchildren. They lovingly placed their pictures/notes they'd written for Grandma Nelda in a basket and watched her ashes being placed next to Grandpa Paul's. They were so reverent and loving, without any instruction. It was very sweet. It's hard to know how to explain death to children, but I felt good about how this service went and the conversations we were able to have. Later in the afternoon, we gathered to attend her funeral service at her home church (while the kids played at the house with a sitter). Scriptures were lovingly read and Brent shared collective memories from the grandchildren. Following is what he wrote/shared. He did a super job - touching and funny.

"For as long as I can remember, my grandma drove a Lincoln town car. Not just any town car, but one that was over the top. The one that best captured my grandma's personality was candy apple red with a bright white vinyl top. This car stood out. I guarantee that she was the only one in Phoenix with this color combination.

It occurred to me that her car was a metaphor for her life & personality.
For those of us who knew her well Nelda was larger than life. To me she was the quintessential grandma.

Grandma helped drive the grandkids. She showered us with love and devotion. She was actively involved in our lives and she supported us beyond measure.

Continuing with the car metaphor, she was the family's transmission. She held the family together with a constant flow of information. She would always have the scoop on the gang in MN or WVA or wherever the family was scattered. She was up to date on what we were up to and into – cycling, cheering, weight-lifting, snow-boarding, baseball and football. Gretchen recalled how she provided a way for us all to stay in contact. She was a big believer in staying in touch and keeping us tied together.

Grandma definitely took the family to the drive thru. Meal time was family time. We had lots of meals together, whether it was a stop at Jack in the Box after church, going to a fancy dinner that required us to dress up, or to a big family dinner at her house.

Grandma taught us all how to drive forward to arrive at a goal. She believed in the power of education and the opportunities that it would provide. She put her resources on the line to ensure that all of her grandchildren had the college education they chose. She supported and believed in us and wanted us to succeed. As a result, we have two lawyers, one teacher, one police office and a businessman.

Grandma knew how to work the horn. It was a rare occasion that we were someplace and they did not know who the grandma was. “I am the grandma here” was often the proclamation. It was hard to miss Grandma as she tooted her own horn. It was a honk that was not offensive, she generally would end up winning the affection of those she was around. As a kid I remember her getting hugs and kisses from my friends, because she was “ THE Grandma.”

Grandma's Lincoln took us on family vacations. Growing up we took almost every vacation with Grandma and Grandpa. Scott remembers that trips with Grandma meant that you were likely to have room service. That was livin'. She wanted us to do everything and see the world. She sent us on trips and to places to have the experiences she had. She wanted us to live life to the fullest and she helped make that possible.

Like all big cars she was safe. When you confided in Nelda, she would understand.

Early in my career I had a horrible partner. He was, quite simply, a difficult human being. I was very young and was having a very hard time dealing with the verbal attacks and abusive work environment. One afternoon the contention was out of control, and I could not take it any more so I left my factory and went for a drive. I was going to throw it all away and start over. While clearing my head I made my way to Grandma's house. I went in to see her and recapped the entire situation in tears. Like grandmas often do, she started with a big hug and said that it was going to be OK. “Honey, if we have to start over then we have to start over,” she said. There was no shame in it. With one simple act of grace my grandma lifted my spirits that day and in turn helped me save the business. With the calm and peace my grandma had given my heart, I gained enough composure to plan a way to fix my situation.

Grandma was a Lincoln. She was safe and warm and helped move our family forward. She has now handed us the keys, so that we may impart these values and traditions to the next generation. Now, Tibby and Penny are continuing the Grandma traditions. And some day we too will pass on what Nelda gave us to our grandchildren: values of love, affection, generosity, and family first."

Grandma Nelda doing her favorite thing - holding great-grandchildren